Subconscious Patterns that affect our Personal Growth

Our subconscious mind is the reason why we do things the way we do them. Why things are the way they are in our life. Our surroundings and circumstances are a reflection of our subconscious beliefs. We are programmed in a certain way based on our home environment during our formative years. It’s a mix of nature and nurture that becomes our identity and breaking away and making an identity shift requires a lot of effort. However, when we put in this work and try to understand ourselves better, we see life transform for the better. As healed individuals, we see the world differently and even during unhappy circumstances, we are capable of facing adversity with faith. Highlighted below are some subconscious patterns that have a big impact on our personal growth:

Negative self talk

Constant negative self talk can make us believe the things we tell ourselves to be the truth. It’s hard for our subconscious mind to show us we can be different, we can change and we can adopt new habits. By repeating negative beliefs, we create a toxic environment inside our minds and make it doubly challenging for us to feel content with who we are. Subconscious patterns like these are not easy to break away from but with mindful choices we can see a big difference.

Poor body image

We idealize others and focus on all the things we think we lack when we don’t meet society’s fake beauty standards. A spiritual journey is essential to overcome this toxic relationship we have with our own bodies and negative subconscious programming. Instead of accepting ourselves just the way we are, we constantly think about looking better. We may even end up considering ourselves not worthy of love and affection, if we don’t match what is considered to be ideal by projections of the beauty industry. Fair is beautiful, thin is in — these are negative reinforcements that have caused long term, irrevocable damage to innumerable lives. 

Self betrayal

When we don’t pay attention to our own needs and agree to do things just to be in a relationship or a job — even when we feel grossly mistreated, we are betraying ourselves. The after effects of such choices may cause deep rooted trauma and affect future happiness too.

People pleasing

Always being there for others and not getting the same love, time, affection or support in return will eventually drain you of all your resources. By the time you realise, your relationships are not well balanced, it may seem like it’s too late. But, you must take things in your control and put an end to pleasing people. Be gentle with yourself when you find yourself saying sorry to narcissists who use and abuse you. People pleasers are kind and sensitive by nature and they more often than not have parents with narcissistic personality disorder. If you are quick to agree to others’ demands or requests, and have a hard time saying ‘no’ even when you want to say no, it’s a sign that you may be suffering from people-pleasing.

Thinking Lack in your subconscious mind

As kids, we are told that money doesn’t grow on trees and that we need to be frugal. All this becomes deeply ingrained in our minds and we may continue to believe that money is limited and that living in abundance may be too far-fetched a dream. If we are constantly repeating to ourselves that we are poor and we can’t afford that, we are training ourselves to remain poor. Reprogramming the mind to accept new beliefs and work on an identity change can be life changing.

You think your past defines your present

If we stay stuck in our past and keep thinking about all the things that didn’t work out, we are ruining our present. We are giving up on our chances to live life anew and see things from a fresh perspective. Healing is necessary but looking forward to each day is a must as well.

Subconscious patterns that indicate lack of self love

When we lack self-love, we do things that cause us misery and suffering. A history of self neglect and chaotic bonds, not eating healthy – all point towards lack of self love. When we learn to become aware of our body’s needs, we do things that are healthy for us.

You don’t practice gratitude

Gratitude for things that are going well in our life brings us more reasons to be happy and satisfied. The more we express gratitude, we remain open to opportunities that improve the quality of our life. Our subconscious patterns will gradually evolve when we make gratitude an integral part of our personality and nature.


The priority, in this blog, is to supply the reader with clear and unambiguous information. However, neither The New Me nor Gagan Dhawan makes promises, or guarantees regarding the completeness of the information found here. The content is not a replacement for advice of a licensed professional. The opinions expressed in this blog are solely that of the writer’s.

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